Fred-on

noun. A tingly, banana-like predicament caused by a sex god named Fred.

Real citation: “NRO's Corner got a red, throbbing Fred-on last night during and after the Republican debate in South Carolina, a group swelling that has Roy Edroso at Alicublog reaching for a fire extinguisher and lion-tamer's chair. Based on fan reaction to last night's performance, Fred Thompson is the new old Gipper, appealing to Golden Girls of all ages and genders.”
(James Wolcott, Jan. 11, 2008, http://www.vanityfair.com/politics/blogs/wolcott/2008/01/let-me-add-my-h.html)

Made-up citation: “Wilma reveals her secrets: How to maintain a Fred-on while getting dinopoop out of the carpet.”